Doldrums: the maritime use. We are in it. Need some fresh wind for our sails.
So what is different enough that I have put thumbs to touchscreen? Not much really. A simple conversation over adult drinks with some friends with a comment of, "you should write a book." That was followed by, um yeah, I had this blog..... Which was then followed by someone sending me a link to a piece written by a mom, describing the worst end of school year mom. (http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/3378480). Pretty funny stuff and we can totally relate, although I am too proud to admit our prison is in quiet that bad of shape.
I read some of the first reports to reminisce. I can't really say that was my good stuff, but I wish I could come close to that again.
So, here I am, thumbs tapping. The initial excitement to revive my blog from the hiatus has already worn off. The prison is quiet. The inmates and the warden are sound asleep. The only sounds in the prison are the humidifiers and fans that are throughout the building to act more as a distraction than as anything else. The humidifiers offer noise in the cells. The fan is to dull my snoring so the warden can sleep. I should be sleeping as well. The prisoners will be up soon. But I can't sleep. I enjoy the peace right now. And once I fall asleep, I will awake to chaos. Chaos is further away if I don't sleep.
I can already predict the first chaotic moment that awaits. #1 lost a tooth. The tooth fairy did not arrive as scheduled and this morning I had to address her tardiness. #1 was actually happy (MUCH to my relief). She could take the tooth to school to show it off. The problem now though? I can't find the dang tooth. I am not sure if it was placed under the pillow, or if #1 hid it. She has already asked me multiple times if I am the tooth fairy so I can't just stuck the money under the pillow. It could be a trap. She is cagey like that.
as much as I wish I could spin a yarn akin to my original daily reports, I can't. They say nothing good happens after midnight. It is also true that nothing creative happens after midnight.
In my attempts to think of something to write, I looked back at some of my draft entries that just never panned out (yeah, this drivel made the cut, but there are many others that did not). Here is something that had potential:
There are things that have come out of my mouth that as soon as I have said it, I have immediately thought, "wow, THAT sentence has probably never been muttered outside a prison." Here is a list.
No. A toilet is not a good way to style your hair.
Please do not put that lollipop in #3's ear.
Just because a minion can do it, does not mean you can.
Do not lick #3.
The elf is not going to come out of the TV and take you away.
There is not a monster in your tummy making you sick.
Pull your pants up and do NOT stick your butt in (insert any prisoner's name)'s face.
Do not smell your finger, and no, I don't want to smell your finger either after you stuck it there.
So, on THAT low note, I will sign off. The prison is still standing. The prisoners are still alive. There are still only 3 of them.
